Back from vacation

Hey everyone! I hope each and every one of y’all had an amazing weekend!

So as some of you know I went to Daytona over the weekend. I had a great time. The weather was perfect! Where I live the humidity is crazy stupid and you can’t step outside without automatically dripping sweat and feeling dehydrated. In Daytona it was hot but the humidity was much lower and we stayed right on the beach so the wind was so nice. Half of my karge Filipino family was there so everyone had someone to talk to and spend time with.

We stayed at The Plaza Hotel which I highly recommend. It has 12 floors, ocean view rooms, room service, pool which is within reach of the beach, and a BUFFET breakfast. Theres much more this hotel has to offer but these were just some of the perks.

My anxiety wasn’t bad at all while we were down there. The only time I had a little anxiety was on the ride down there and thats because we had a couple of my family members riding with us and we don’t spend much time with them so for me it was a little awkward.

So overall my family and I had a great time and I know that we will be going back tbere. 🙂 Have a great day everyone!😁❤

Starting a “diet”

So my husband and I have been talking and talking about finally getting off our butts and working out together. Well we started just that….finally. With exercising I thought Id finally try dieting of some sort. I went head first into it and we started our first workout with cardio and *I* started my diet by semi fasting. I start my day off with coffee, because honestly I’d lose my shit if I couldn’t have it. After my coffee I just drink water- ALL.DAY.LONG. I’m not starving myself either. With it being summer in the south (103*f no lie) I just dont get hungry alot during the day. At nigjt is when my body decides I’m deprived and I’ll eat a little something, like a banana or Apple…something healthy with low carbs. The carbs is what I’m really trying to cut down on. My body-my flanks- just love to hold on to every little bit. So now im on day 2 and tonight is when its starting to take its toll. I’ve got a terrible headache and my stomach does hurt a little. From what I’ve read this is because my body isn’t used to not having all the fats and carbs I’m usually eating and its having to get energy from elsewhere.

Im staying positive and going to try to keep on with this. All help or advice is appreciated!

Goodnight everyone!


Today was a good day

Mentally. Today wasnt super exciting or one where I had a break through. Today was just a good day. Ive said in previous posts that I suffer from both anxiety and depression and I know so far I havent talked much about my depression. Thats because Ive been really good at keeping it under control for the past few years now. I now know when im starting to feel down and I can usually get myself out of that funk before it gets bad. Now a days my anxiety is bad which is why I talk more about that.

Anyways today I just felt good. My husband and I started exercising together. This is besides getting on our treadmill. We’re starting with light cardio that we cast on our t.v. from YouTube. Its great so far but it is only day one. Im staying positive about this. I feel good about this! We’re also startimg a low carb diet which was easy because today is the first day. The problem is, is that we go out to eat just about every weekend and thats where this “diet” is going to test us.

***Keepin It Positive***

Getaway Vaca

Does anybody else feel as if getting out of your house and out of your town the only way to calm the f down?! I know dealing with anxiety that most of the time i dont mind being at home, binge watching Big Brother while having a beer, but im so excited to be getting out of my small town this weekend. I’m also excited about (hopefully) having at least a couple hours alone with my husband. We have two kids together. One is 4 and one is 10. They have VERY different personalities…. Here we go…. I’m going into detail mommy/kid mode.

My 10 year old has a teenage girl attitude already but is pretty well mannered and was our calm child when younger. The problem? She is also pretty spoiled and always has been because she was first born and the first grandchild to my husbands mom as well as being named after my mom. She won everyones hearts from the get go. Anywho she has a little bit of an attitude and does not like not getting what she wants. A sulky face and puppy dog eyes if u will.

My 4 year old boy was meant to be our second child (lol) because he is very outgoing, sociable, loud. Lets dumb it down…. NOT SHY. NOT AFRAID TO SPEAK HIS MIND. TEMPER TANTRUMS GALOREEE. I mostly love that he’s not shy. He makes friends easily at the park. He talks and charms his way around. Sweetness. Until Sunday/Monday rolls back around and everyone has to go back into the routine of work-sleep-work-sleep. Again he has ALOT of energy so keeping him in a house with his 10 year old sister who wants to play roblox and talk to her friends and pretty much be by herself is not for him. This is when the yelling and arguing and whininggggg begins.

So MY point is: As much as i love my kids and woyld do anything for them, I need a break…. And have an adult drink and adult conversation. On a beach.

I Get Anxiety THINKING About Being Around People Now.

Okay, so let me start by saying that I dont get anxious being around ALL people…. I’m actually great around strangers. When I go out for a night downtown, clubbing, drinking, etc I’m amazing at being sociable. I dont give a fuck if someone likes me or not…likes what I say or act or not. My problem is actually when im around my family or my husbands family. I love them all btw. With MY family I feel as if I’m always walking on eggshells. There are different personalities, none of which I can fully be comfortable with. I am ,however, the only one with open anxiety and depression and in my family you cannot sit down and talk about your feelings without being joked about or ignored honestly 😦 With my husbands family there is nothing that they do to make me feel bad or uncomfortable. They are the opposite actually. They are always trying to make everyone feel good and they want everyone to have a good time. Its me… My anxiety kicks in when just planning a trip to go see either of our families. When i actually get to their house im fine. Anxiety is mostly gone. I think to much about how certain family members are going to act or say. I worry about me just sitting there looking bored or over thinking about how my face looks (how im presenting myself) or if my husband leaves my side ….what will I do?

Fuck you Anxiety.